Today was one of those days. I ran perpetually 20 minutes late. Work was insane. My pants were too tight. My sweater was itchy. I have a bug bite the size of Jupiter on my elbow. AND, my “check engine” light decided to flicker on. FABULOUS. Calming myself down with breakfast for dinner. So twacked out. Can’t even type in full sentences.
Take deep breath and…
1 lb waxy potatoes
1 lb brussels sprouts
3-4 whole canned peeled tomatoes
½ yellow onion, diced
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 tsp sugar
1 tsp sweet paprika
½ tsp hot paprika
Trim the nubby stalk off your brussels sprouts with a knife, and resist the urge to plunge it into the person next to you. Remove any outer leaves if they look discolored, and cut the spouts in half. Scrub your potatoes to clean, because peeling them is not an option right now. Cut into the same size as the brussels. Blot the spud chunks dry on a paper towel. Don’t skip this step no matter how frantic you feel, because, if you don’t, you will be punished with oil splatters to the face once you get to frying them. And that would ruin your day.
Heat a cast iron pan over medium-high heat and fill with a ¼ inch of olive oil. Once the oil is as hot as your temper, add the potatoes in one even layer and give ‘em some salt and pepper. While the potatoes are frying, dice the onion and sauté in another pan over medium heat with salt and pepper until they are translucent. Then add in the garlic, both paprikas, and enough olive oil to re-moisten the mixture. Add in the sugar and tomatoes, and cook for another couple of minutes before removing from the heat.
By now your potatoes should be golden brown and crispy, so remove them from the pan and drain them on a paper towel. Toss your brussels sprouts into that same hot oil and STAND BACK. They will splatter. And if you are in the crossfire, you will want to break things.
Salt and pepper those sprouts, but don’t fuss with them in the pan until they get nice and caramelized on the first side. When they are, give them a stir and lower the heat down to medium. Splash them with a ¼ cup of water and let them cook another 5 minutes, or until tender. Now, blend in your cooled tomato mixture. Adjust salt, pepper, and spiciness level. Today I need it spicy, to match my fiery soul.
When I am having a day like this, cooking calms me down. So in order to extend this therapy for as long as I can get, I’ll make a second sauce. And I suggest you do too, because this simple aioli is pretty damn delicious.
1 egg yolk
½ cup grape seed oil
1 clove garlic, finely minced
1 tbs dijon mustard
1 tbs apple cider vinegar
1 tsp water, if needed
Put all of these ingredients in a cup or bowl and blend with an immersion blender. If it’s a little thick, add water in 1 tsp increments. Voilà. Aioli. Oh, and fry up those eggs to top off your brussels bravas. Pinch a little paprika over each egg if you’re feeling extra fucking fancy.
To serve: mix the potatoes back in with the cooked brussels, top with fried eggs, and spoon over both sauces. Lie to yourself and only eat half to start, because this dish is supposed to serve 3-4 people. Then, eat the other half cold out of the fridge an hour later. If that doesn’t make you feel all-better, I don’t know what will.
- 1 lb waxy potatoes
- 1 lb brussels sprouts
- 3-4 whole canned peeled tomatoes
- ½ yellow onion, diced
- 2 cloves garlic, minced
- 1 tsp sugar
- 1 tsp sweet paprika
- ½ tsp hot paprika
- 1 egg yolk
- ½ cup grape seed oil
- ½ lemon, juiced
- 1 clove garlic, minced
- 1 tbs dijon mustard
- 1 tbs apple cider vinegar
- Trim brussels sprouts, remove discolored outer leaves and cut in half
- Scrub and cube potatoes, then blot dry on a paper towel
- Heat a cast iron pan over medium-high heat and fill with a ¼ inch of olive oil
- Once the oil is hot, add the potatoes in one even layer with salt and pepper
- Cook until brown, and crisp then drain on a paper towel
- Dice onion and sauté in another pan over medium heat with salt and pepper until they are translucent
- Add in garlic, both paprikas, and enough olive oil to re-moisten the mixture
- Add in the sugar and tomatoes, and cook for another couple of minutes before removing from the heat
- Cook brussels sprouts with salt and pepper in the same oil that the potatoes came out of
- Stand back, they will splatter
- Don’t fuss with them in the pan until they get nice and caramelized on the first side
- When they are, stir them around and lower the heat to medium., and splash them with a ¼ cup of water
- Cook them another 5 minutes, or until tender
- Blend your cooled tomato mixture. Adjust salt, pepper, and spiciness level
- For the aioli, put all of the ingredients in a cup or bowl and blend with an immersion blender
- If it’s a little thick, add water in 1 tsp increments
- Then fry up the eggs to top off your brussels
- Pinch a little paprika over each egg if you’re feeling extra fancy.
- To serve: mix the potatoes back in with the cooked brussels, top with fried eggs and spoon over both sauces