Not like that you pervs.
You know what I mean.
Well whaddoyaknow! The sun is shining, the leaves are turning, and it’s a goddamn beautiful fall day. Why spoil all of this glory with some crazy-complicated lunch? Those recipes are for when life is crashing down around you and you’re trying to regain your sanity. You know, our food therapy. When life is easy like this, it’s time for non-recipe recipes.
And you know what? This is the best damn salad of all time. It’s THE salad. And so what if it’s a non-recipe? There’s no one here to fire me.
Some spring mix with spinach 50/50 blend
3 strips of bacon
1 ½ oz bleu cheese crumbles
1 handful almonds, chopped
1 handful dried cranberries
1/8 cup olive oil
1/8 cup balsamic vinegar
2 tsp honey
¼ tsp salt
¼ tsp pepper
Are you ready for the hardest part? The only part, I should say. Dice up some bacon and cook it over medium heat until crisp. That’s it, people. Literally the only job you have right now is to fry the bacon without eating all of it as you go. And if you do, I won’t tell anyone. When it’s cooked through, drain it on some paper towel. There, you’re 50-percent done with this non-recipe recipe.
In a large bowl add your greens, cranberries, almonds, and blue cheese. Don’t have dried cranberries? Throw in some golden raisins. Don’t have golden raisins? How about some diced granny smith apples.
Oh, and you’re all out of almonds? Walnuts will do just fine. And you don’t like bleu cheese, you say? Well, first of all, we’re no longer friends. And second of all, just toss in some feta, or even cubed sharp cheddar cheese. If you have your bacon, something crunchy, something sweet, and something cheesy, this will turn out just fine. Isn’t it nice when things just work out?
Now, onto the dressing. The key to this, or any dressing, is to have equal parts acid to oil, and plenty of salt and pepper. If you can remember this truth, all of life’s doors will open for you.
In a small bowl, mix the olive oil, balsamic, and honey with a fork. Don’t forget that salt and pepper. Voilà, the-best-salad-dressing-ever. Pour it over the-easiest-salad-ever. And get on with your easy day. Easy.
- Spring mix with spinach 50/50 blend
- 3 strips of bacon
- 1 ½ oz bleu cheese crumbles
- 1 handful almonds, chopped
- 1 handful dried cranberries
- ⅛ cup olive oil
- ⅛ cup balsamic vinegar
- 2 tsp honey
- ¼ tsp salt
- ¼ tsp pepper
- Dice bacon and cook until crisp
- Drain on a paper towel
- Put greens, bleu cheese, dried cranberries, and chopped almonds into a salad bowl
- Top with bacon pieces
- For the dressing, mix olive oil, vinegar, honey, salt and pepper together
- Toss the salad with the dressing